Niggas & Bitches
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White people using the n-word isn’t an issue to me. White people treating us like the n-word is. Sticks and stones, man. Sure, hearing it used does bother me, but I’m not gonna have a meltdown over it. The people that do use it regularly, I simply avoid. Usually, because there’s a “wannabe” aspect about it. Someone is either trying to be uber-cool or controversial. Either way, I know what I need to know about that person, and keep my distance.

 
It’s not just the usage. It’s the intention. For example, I regularly use “bitches” in person and online. I often re-share the meme of Dougie Howser’s “Bitches like to be called Beautiful” because I personally think it’s funny. But you will almost never hear me use “the b-word” with derogatory intent, especially to specific individuals. When I do, I’m calling out a bitch acting like a bitch. Generally speaking, I don’t generalize females as bitches. I have a broadly higher view of them, as a whole. To that end, I reflect that in my language, both in public and in private.
 
Now, in very specific context, I have a very select few female friends that I do refer to as “bad bitches”, or affectionately “my bitches”. They are, in fact, bitches, and they’re proud of it. It’s a compliment to them, if they are cool with you. They get to decide if it’s cool, not us. Y’all bitches know who you are. I love you for that.
 
My niggas (personally, in this context, my niggaz) are also within a very exclusively small circle. Not all of them are Black. They know who they are. They get to decide if it’s cool, not us. Y’all niggas know who you are. I love you for that.
 
Either way, it’s a very small circle of friends (I can add up both groups together on one hand), and even then we may use it upon sparse greetings, but not in regular conversations. It’s unnecessary and tacky.  We know who we are, and don’t need the constant reminding.
 
Everyone else, just remember, how you express yourself says a lot about yourself. Consider your words wisely. Project the kind of person you want to be remembered as. Your language often reflects the company you keep.  If you’re constantly referencing bitches, you’re probably either surrounded by bitches, or treat most women like bitches. If you’re always barking about niggas, then you’re either surrounded by niggas, or you think the people around you are niggas themselves. If you don’t like your surroundings, change your language, change your circles. Birds of a feather, man.
 
What you think shapes what you say. What you say shapes what you do. What you do shapes who you are. Think about that.
 
 

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